The 1st Step: First Things First

The first step on any journey toward something IS NOT the most obvious step toward its direction.

Sound contradictory?

Maybe not...

The first step in attaining something should be your full 100% confidence in yourself that when you do attain it you will enrich it, make VERY good use of it, or make it grow substantially.

Let me explain.

I would love to be the CEO of a Fortune 500 company. If there was an e-book or a DVD program outlining step-by-step how to go about it and do it, I would surely buy it and put it into practice right away.

However, even if I followed the directions exactly to the point AND the advice in the program was 100% legit, at this point in time I would probably not be able to attain the end goal the program promised.

Why?

Quite simply, if I was to take over one of those large companies today, they would surely go bankrupt in a few weeks time.

EVEN though I wouldn't MEAN to do it.

They would surely go down in flames, let me assure you. I don't even do my own tax returns, let alone give the green light to the accountants who would be dealing with millions or billions of dollars.

At this point in time, EVEN if I was handed over the job like that from a good friend, I would turn it down.

Am I crazy you ask? Not at all.

All I have to do is think of all the families and lives I would destroy from taking the position and crumbling the company down.

The same applies when you are out searching for people to bring into your life (coincidentally enough!)

Whether for a night, a week, a year or a lifetime.

If they were to put their life into your hands for whatever period of time, would you enrich it? Make them grow a little? A lot?

Or at the very least - make them enjoy themselves having a very good time with you?

(remember the good old saying "leave them better than you've found them"?)

Note that the above intentions can not co-exist with your personal motives like:

1. Wanting to show off your ability to get a one-night stand in front of your friends.

2. Proving to yourself that you can get girls of a certain caliber.

3. Essentially showing off to everyone that you can get a hot chick.

When you keep your focus and attention on HER Benefits instead of yours, you will attain an unshakable confidence about you which is far more noticeable than boldness.

"That's great," you say, "but what if I can't get to the point where we both sit down so she can start to see that I am capable of giving her all this and that I actually want to give it to her?"

Well, if you're out and about, in any social setting talking to a girl, it means you are

1. With her

2. Talking with her

3. either a) Around her friends

or b) Around your friends

What else do you need/want?

The only thing that's different from her and a girlfriend you already know is time.

In other words, right after you Open her, there's no time like the present to start showing her a good time! Why wait?

If she's unresponsive, treat her just like you would any other friend who is unresponsive to your behaviour. It's like, "OOPS."

If you're getting a long string of bad responses, admit that you might not be someone who they want around. Oops, whatever.

Adam, one of my really good friends from London, is hands down one of the best socializers in the world. (I substitute what people would usually call a PUA/Seducer/Don Juan with the word 'socializer' instead)

"I start in Comfort," he says referring to the commonly accepted model of seduction that you must first attain attraction before you try for comfort, "If I'm actively trying to show her that I am someone worth meeting, I would be subtly communicating that I am NOT someone worth meeting unless I let her know verbally. I can accomplish all that by simply making her laugh!"

I whole-heartedly agree with Adam on this one, as you are shooting yourself in the foot if you feel the need to actually actively show people you are someone of high value.

People of high value do not go around demonstrating their high value left, right and center.

Actually, after meeting a few of them and hearing about so many others and their attitudes, they NEVER bring out their character traits and possessions or whatever else that make them high value, and actually almost ALWAYS downplay themselves while bringing out the best out of people around them...

And I don't want to prove to anyone that I am someone they want to know. If I am, then I am. If I'm not, well, then I'm not. I'm still going to make them bust a gut.

So, the first step...

Ask yourself honestly - are you a person you would like if you were to meet yourself? What if you were to meet your clone, except he liked, and disliked everything the opposite of you? Would you still like him?

Think about it...

What everyone needs to know to start their journey

Simplicity is hacking away the unessential. – It is not daily increase but daily decrease – hack away the unessential! The closer to the source, the less wastage there is. –Bruce Lee


When I started my Journey 5 years ago, I wasn’t a typical student of the art. I was popular, had enough girls, and hung out with the cool crowd. When I go back to my hometown I have people I’d never seen before come up telling me they knew who I was. I ask them,”Which class were we in?” with them excitedly replying, “Oh no, we were never in class, I know you because you hung out with so and so. You guys were always too cool for us.” Clearly.

So why plunge into the Journey? I was leaving for University and wanted the extra edge. I was scared I couldn’t replicate my status in the new setting. When I stumbled upon the seduction community I was overwhelmed by how many different ways you could meet a girl. At the time I only knew one way. I wanted so badly to learn every seduction style in order to give myself the best advantage. If I was in a coffee shop, I would use the latest day-game tactics. If I was in a nightclub, I would use the latest buying temperature pumper material. I desired an impenetrable fortress of tactics so there would be no scenario where I would not know what to do. I wanted to know beforehand, not while I was in the middle of a conversation. Thinking on my feet was something unpredictable so it didn’t interest me as a long term solution to my social life. Little did I know what mess I was getting into.

I was always about building my social life as opposed to just getting amazing at “picking up” chicks. However, when I began I foolishly became very good at getting women first, thinking the world would then admire me for my Don Juan like abilities, thus taking care of my social life. Who else can relate to this?

I was in for a rude awakening. My plan did not turn out the way I predicted. The people who admired me weren’t people I liked, the girls I brought into my life left, and the ones who really got to know me shunned me when they discovered who I really was; someone wishing they were someone else. (Read: Trying to be cool)

That was 3 years ago. I decided to take a break from everything due to my current results. I chipped away at the fake unpleasant persona I built up over the years, a little each day. 3 years later, I am overcome by a wave of immeasurable gratitude. The people I attract into my life are all good people, the ladies are all ones I won over by being myself (which also means I don’t have to do much else to keep them), and my favourite point of all, I have the BEST social circle on the planet. It consists of people who I can truly just be myself and am not personally judged for any of my actions or beliefs. Sure, they will give their opinions and criticism, but never think any less of me for choosing what I have chosen. I am very lucky to have stumbled upon this last point. It has been my backbone for realizing my Principles for Unlimited Social Success.

I was out with my friend recently who is one of the best naturals I have ever seen. I’ve learned much more from him than vice versa. He wanted advice on how to approach a girl. (Even the best look for advice when the pressure’s on) What this lead to was the discovery of a simple system which ALWAYS gives you the PERFECT thing to say – ON THE SPOT, AND making it real, authentic, and genuine to the core. What you say will always make sense to the other person.

I’m so excited as I have been sharing new personal thoughts and philosophies with close and respected friends. These friends include Chartered Accountants, International Corporate Lawyers, all the way to my old Psychology Professor. Respectively, they have each used my Principles to build better relationships with their clients, land the cases they want, and dedicating a class and an assignment to their class for my teachings.

My principles are universal and are always effective. I am excited to share them with anyone who wants to learn. They are simple enough for ANYONE to learn and easy enough to apply right now. It is also an impenetrable system that never fails. You will always know what to do. I will be giving you the pieces to the puzzle in the blog posts to come.

-Tung